Welcome losers, one and all!
Welcome fakers, con artists, pretenders, narcissists, the vulnerable, broken and depressed. Welcome to those suffering anxiety, not achieving their full potential, those carrying shame, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of moving forward, fear of standing still.
Welcome to anyone who is lost and seeking clarity. To those wanting to find themselves and lose the burden they’ve been carrying around.
That burden is heavy.
The burden to succeed is implanted in all of us from a very young age. Our parents expect us to walk. Well what if we just don’t want to?
What if we want to just sit on the couch, sucking our thumbs and watching Mickey fucking Mouse for the rest of our lives?
Errr…. Perhaps a bit of an over-exaggeration, but you get me, yeah?
Anyway, welcome!
You have found your home. You are not alone. You can be yourself here, in the void where failure is acceptable- Nay! Failure is a given! Failure is our right! Failure is lauded and celebrated. Failure is what most of us will experience. I’m going to actually go so far as to say EVERYONE FAILS.
You know all those successful people you admire?
Yeah, the ones with the big houses, big jobs, big instagram pages, big businesses, the successful careers, the quick wit, the good looks, perfect body, the cute boyfriend or girlfriend. All those people you think are better than you… THEY HAVE ALL FAILED! And they will continue to fail in life, like you and me, because failure IS GUARANTEED!
Guess what folks! IT’S OK TO FAIL!
And I’ll tell you why. I’ll even tell you for free.
WITHOUT FAILURE, THERE CAN BE NO SUCCESS.
BOOM. There it is.
When I had this realisation, I immediately felt freedom. The freedom to be myself.
You know, I want to be successful like everyone else. I want to be, but when I want something really really badly, I freeze. I just clam up, roll into a ball and suffer intense anxiety that I then need to self medicate or sooth with other things that are not good for me.
I end up with a bad case of PARALYSIS BY ANALYSIS.
I end up stuck and resentful and angry because I’m not living up to my full potential. I’m over fucking 40 now my friends and I have spent the better part of my life trying to pretend that I was all good.
Well, I’m not. But I’m ok. I’m not the best, not the worst, kinda average, middle of the road, not a success, nor a total failure, though I have failed many times to achieve my goals.
I guess deep down I will never stop trying.
Deep down the desire to succeed may be hard-wired into my brain. Like, encoded on my DNA ‘n’ shit.
BUT, I am giving myself permission to fail because wanting to succeed only serves to paralyse me, and I want to keep moving forward, keep trying to help people, keep trying to succeed at being an author and copywriter, keep trying to be a good parent and wife and friend and daughter, but in order to achieve success, I first have to be ok with failure.
I’m taking the pressure off, and I invite you to come along on this journey too.
This is a safe space.
You can unzip your belt and stop sucking in your gut here.
Take a deep breath and allow yourself to just be.
Till the next post. Happy failing!
xx Sharona